we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
