4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
