Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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