Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
