so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Randomize