For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
