I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Randomize
