His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just pynch a tree in the face
i can't believe i had my finger in that
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
