At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
