i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You can't motorboat a personality
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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