did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
