They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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