Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Randomize
