Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize