if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize