thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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