I think scott just propositioned me for sex
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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