I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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