This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
