clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
