Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
