She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
