i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
