I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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