ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I am available for nakedness
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
