so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
