did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
