Don't you send me to vm
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
