just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
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