So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
