He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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