and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
