As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
