I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
