So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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