Heybabeimwearingurpanties
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
