if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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