I like to think it a success when the cops are called
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Randomize
