Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
