why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize
