sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
