Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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