But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Randomize
