Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
