he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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