i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I think i got beer on your cat.
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