I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I have tasted many bathrooms
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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