he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
