Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
