I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
