I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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